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Thursday, April 27, 2006

Confession

So I've been killing time, doing mindless crap on the laptop, anything to keep me from working on a sex scene that needs to be written.

I mean, come on, I want to be a romance writer, I should LOVE writing sex scenes right? Well, they should at least be EASY to write.

Wrong.

I gotta find a rhythm when writing a sex scene, gotta have uninterrupted time to write it and let's just face it, I have to be in the mood. Isn't that funny, it sounds a lot like...having sex!

But I digress. So in my process of killing time, I decided to open up the wip that I wrote during NaNo in Nov. A blitz of a 55,000 word wip that I completed in a month. I wanted to revisit the story, knowing it's a story that I'll never publish, and maybe I could crib some good ideas, scenes, words, whatever from it.

Here's the Confession Part 1 - I used the same characters that I'm working with right now. Oh, there's a lot of differences, but basically it's the same two. I love these two, I want their story told, and when I gave up on the NaNo, I just tweaked them (a lot) and started the current wip. I've never done this before, but with these two, I just had to.

Confession Part 2 - My 55,000 blitz of a wip is not bad. It's the virgin hero story I gave up on. There's some great stuff in there. I'm not trying to brag, but my subplot is fab. The hero's best friend and the heroine's sister get together, complete polar opposites and they are funny. I was writing this for HQ Blaze, so I still would've had 20,000 words to go on the sucker. But I finished it in a sense, I wrote the final scene and I had a plan for the rest. It was a matter of going back and adding a few more scenes to the subplot mostly and a lot of layering.

So why did I give up on this thing? I think I suffered from "I stinkitis." (Who made that up, anyway? I read it somewhere and I loved it cos I have this ailment quite often). I thought it sucked. I thought no one would be interested in a virgin hero. I thought there wasn't enough conflict.

I think I was wrong. There's so much internal conflict with these two it's crazy. And the creative ways they come up with to avoid losing his virginity. My, my I wrote a trifle hot back in Nov.What am I going to do with this thing? I have no idea, cos all of a sudden, I don't want to give up on it. But there's going to be a lot of work. I need to change the plot quite a bit (there's a few overlapping things between the two wips and one unrealistic part that I would want to chuck altogether), change the characters (can't have two stories with the same names - that's just plain stupid). Oh, it sounds like a nightmare.

It's been so long since I gave it a complete read through, and when I got close to the end, the "black moment," I guess you would call it, I cried. I don't think I've ever done that with anything I've written before!

I should've never opened up the thing - it was like opening up a new can of worms to worry about, when I already have one I'm worrying about right now.

Frick.